Last night session was particularly heavy and exhausting.
I still have blood under my nails and the taste of it in my mouth.
The scalpel lays dirty on the table and the ashes of that rose with the remains of the paper used is in the ashtray on the altar.
I never had so many cups coming up in a spread since I had met him.
They tell me to be patient and the final outcome will be the 5 of cups reversed.
For now I just need to wait and be patient, accept the separation and just hold this ace of cups in my hands.
It hurts to wake up without him with me, it hurts knowing that he's so far with his heart and I still cry.
Bitter tears of impotence.